Fake Certificates (40)

We recognize that a “pet” can be as important—even more important in someone’s life than family, or “friends”… We don’t know why everyone doesn’t understand this. Pet Memorial Certificates Call us callous if you must, but we tend to grieve more for our lost pets than we do for most lost humans. We think it’s because of the “innocence factor”. Pets are almost exclusively innocent of evil, while human beings are not. It’s often a Hell of a lot easier to offer unconditional love to a pet than a person. The crew here at TrixiePixGraphics comes mostly from rough-and-tumble lifestyles. Most of us have hunted professionally. Some of us have killed in the line of duty. Several of us have worked as commercial fishermen for decades at a time, killing thousands of times per day, year in and year out. We’ve all seen death. We’ve all had and lost pets. And we’ve scoffed at those who seemed to grieve for their pets a bit more than seemed appropriate. How wrong and stupid we were. As we’ve aged, we come to appreciate life more and more. There are stories of “Great White Hunters” who killed thousands of animals all over the world in their lives, yet suddenly, almost without explanation, hung up their rifles and spent the remainders of their years trying to do good instead of to destroy. Perhaps we’re a bit like that. Someone gave us a ferret many years ago. We saw it as something akin to a mouse—just a rodent kind of thing that might provide some entertainment for awhile. It didn’t take long, however, for that ferret to begin teaching us about life, and true strength, and compassion, and understanding, and love. We came to love that being as we’ve loved nothing else on this earth, and since his sad, excruciatingly painful passing, we’ve kept the shop full of the little terminators because, honestly, we simply can’t live without them. Our relationships with them have proven to be deeper and more profound than we ever dreamed possible, and we’re chagrined at the foolishness of our youth. We’ve seen friends forge and maintain deep relationships with aardvarks, wolves, coyotes, birds, dogs, cats, hedge-hogs, snakes, wild bear, deer, turkeys, turtles, and, yes, even salt water fish and several octopi. We’ll never again take life lightly, and we’ll always have minds that are open to relationships with any other being. When we lose something we’re close to, as we recently lost our ferret, Pikers, we grieve as we’ve never grieved for humans. In fact, we could barely bear it. We think of him every day, and will for the rest of our lives. We’ve purposely omitted a space in this certificate for “date”. We don’t want to be reminded of the date of our loss, and we didn’t imagine anyone else did either. We created the sky above the mountains because we want to think of our pets as being free. We created the mountain scene because our pets, after all, came from a natural world. We kept the certificate simple, because not a lot of words need to pass between people and their pets — the pets know what’s in your heart probably better than do you. We offered one line for a phrase; it should sum up the one emotion you want to always convey to your lost pet’s soul. And we set an image so you can always remember the happy times. We’ve come to see animals as having the same souls as people — except that they’re mostly untainted by society’s nonsense. They’re a more pure form of human beings, that’s how we see them, and couldn’t we all stand a bit more purity of soul and honesty of character in our lives. Please see also “Pet Birth Certificates” Item Number — FC-36b Certificates are personalized with: Pet Name. Phrase. Picture. Your image will either be set as shown above, or, if the image will allow we’ll mask or fade as shown below We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc. FC-36b, “Pet Memorial Certificate” generally ships within 1-2 days. What our customers say about us. Certificates and Other Kinds of Things $24.95 for 2 Item Number — FC-36b This certificate & plastic coated

Did we all go to bed one night and wake up the next morning to find the world had gone INSANE? Granted, the rank of Knight Bachelor doesn't demand much of the recipient, but still... In olden days Royalty Knighted the strongest and the bravest because it wanted these guys on its side in case of war. Knights were called upon to be leaders in the defense of the Kingdom. Now you too can be a KNIGHT!!! You get two copies, personalized with your information, printed on glossy paper. For Entertainment Purposes Only

Los Certificados Cuestan $19.95 y Miden 8.5 x 11 Pulgadas Usted Recibira Dos (2) Certificados Identicos Se podra reemplazar por el certificado aburrido que se obtiene en la mayoria de los Estados O puede ser usado como un regalo chistoso para un matrimonio Certificado Falso de Matrimonio Los Certificados son presionados con estampilla de notario en la parte superior izquierda  Estos no son documentos legales y no seran aceptados por ningun tipo de agencia del govierno. Todas las preguntas o comunicacion debe ser en ingles. Las personas usualmente tambieh preguntan si los certificados de matrimonio falsos son "legales'.'iLegales para divertirce? Si. (sin embargo, revisa las leyes de tu area para estar seguro(a)) Legal para el uso fraudal? No. Si aceptamos cheques, money orders, cashier's check, Master Card y VISA. Los "Certificados Falsos de Matrimonio" generalmente se envia por correo de 1 a 2 diaS.

You'll Receive Two (2) Identical Certificates May be used to replacing the boring certificate issued by most states Or use as a gag wedding or shower gift Fake Marriage Certificate Certificates are pressure embossed with a notary-type stamp in the upper left These are not legal documents and will not be accepted by any government agency as such People often ask us, "How real do these certificates look, anyhow?" There's no way to answer that since everyone's idea of "authentic" is different. In some cases we didn't try to make them look authentic. People also often ask if fake marriage certificates are "legal".  Legal to own for fun? Yes. (but check your local laws to be sure) Legal to use for fraudulent purposes? No.   Our fake marriage certificates are offered for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY and are so stamped. We can't control what you do with them when you receive them, and we're not liable for your actions. If we sell you a pretty polished rock, and you go out and throw it through someone's window, we're not liable for that, either. These certificates are designed for couples who were disappointed (even appalled) at the poor quality of the certificates issued to them by the state. We just wanted to offer something nicer. Or weirder. Or fun-ner. Certificates may be ordered blank, or completed with any data you provide. If you want any of the fields left blank, just type NONE. We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc.. "Fake Marriage Certificate" generally ships within 1-2 days.   WARNING: This item ships to the REGISTERED BILLING ADDRESS ONLY! More original than a musty old greeting card, the perfect replacement for birthday cards, way more fun than a silly eCard, and one or two of our selections might even get you out of writing that MUSHY LOVE POEM... fake marriage certificate, pretty marriage certificate, personalized marriage certificate, certificate of matrimony, certificate of marriage, bogus marriage certificate, make your own marriage certificate, marriage certificates of movie stars, marry a movie star, surprise your mother, aesthetically pleasing marriage certificate, document recovery of damaged documents and marriage license.   

You'll Receive Two (2) Identical Certificates May be used to replacing the boring certificate issued by most states Or use as a gag wedding or shower gift Fake Marriage Certificate Certificates are pressure embossed with a notary-type stamp in the upper left These are not legal documents and will not be accepted by any government agency as such People often ask us, "How real do these certificates look, anyhow?" There's no way to answer that since everyone's idea of "authentic" is different. In some cases we didn't try to make them look authentic. People also often ask if fake marriage certificates are "legal". Legal to own for fun? Yes. (but check your local laws to be sure) Legal to use for fraudulent purposes? No. Our fake marriage certificates are offered for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY and are so stamped. We can't control what you do with them when you receive them, and we're not liable for your actions. If we sell you a pretty polished rock, and you go out and throw it through someone's window, we're not liable for that, either. These certificates are designed for couples who were disappointed (even appalled) at the poor quality of the certificates issued to them by the state. We just wanted to offer something nicer. Or weirder. Or fun-ner. Certificates may be ordered blank, or completed with any data you provide. If you want any of the fields left blank, just type NONE. We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc.. "Fake Marriage Certificate" generally ships within 1-2 days.   WARNING: This item ships to the REGISTERED BILLING ADDRESS ONLY! More original than a musty old greeting card, the perfect replacement for birthday cards, way more fun than a silly eCard, and one or two of our selections might even get you out of writing that MUSHY LOVE POEM... fake marriage certificate, pretty marriage certificate, personalized marriage certificate, certificate of matrimony, certificate of marriage, bogus marriage certificate, make your own marriage certificate, marriage certificates of movie stars, marry a movie star, surprise your mother, aesthetically pleasing marriage certificate, document recovery of damaged documents and marriage license.   

Our fake marriage certificates are offered for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY and are so stamped. We can't control what you do with them when you receive them, and we're not liable for your actions. If we sell you a pretty polished rock, and you go out and throw it through someone's window, we're not liable for that, either. These certificates are designed for couples who were disappointed (even appalled) at the poor quality of the certificates issued to them by the state. We just wanted to offer something nicer. Or weirder. Or fun-ner. This particular certificate may only be ordered BLANK.

Fake Certificates are $16.95 and Measure 8.5 x 11 Inches You’ll Receive Two (2) Identical Certificates May be used as a gag stag party gift or to roast a friend on their birthday, etc. Personalized Fake Diplomas Certificates are pressure embossed with a notary-type stamp in the upper left These are not legal documents and will not be accepted by any government agency as such.In fact, you’ll probably end up in “TerroristJail” if you try to pass one. We’re sorry we even have to add this caveat: NO! We will NOT fill your order for a diploma from the “School of Engineering” in Dubai or Iraq! Our certificates are for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. If it’s not obvious that you intend to use this product for humorous purposes, your order will be cancelled. George W. Bush Graduates from Ninja School NOTICE: Please do not inquire about one-of-a-kind certificates. We make no certificates that do not have a mass market Small print reads: Has Successfully Completed the Course of Study Prescribed by this Institution and is Therefore Entitled to this Diploma AS Testimony Whereof We Have Hereunder Affixed Our Signature(s) This ________ Day of ____________, _____, at ___________________________ Ninja School, School of Ass-Kissing, Pervert School, Makeout School, Astronaut School, Spelling School, Niceness School, School of Tact, Stoopid School, Sex School, Computer Skool, Liar’s School, Drinker’s School, Crazy Driver’s Education, How to Skip School School… You can think of millions more. Frame one and display it next to the professional diplomas in your office to see how long it takes before someone notices. People often ask us, “How real do these certificates look, anyhow?” There’s no way to answer that since everyone’s idea of “authentic” is different. In some cases we didn’t try to make them look authentic. People also often ask if fake diploma certificates are “legal”.Legal to own for fun? Yes. (but check your local laws to be sure)Legal to use for fraudulent purposes? No.Our fake certificates are offered for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY and are so stamped. We can’t control what you do with them when you receive them, and we’re not liable for your actions. If we sell you a pretty polished rock, and you go out and throw it through someone’s window, we’re not liable for that, either. NOTE: The embossed seal says, “Certified [SEAL] Document”. You’ll receive three certificates, all of which are printed on “High Security Paper”, which is a peculiar stock into which many anti-copy schemes are incorporated. For instance: (1) When held under a black light a series of tiny red threads become visible.(2) A large “VOID” appears in the background in four positions when the document has been photocopied.(3) Micro text is printed across the entire document which disappears when rubbed.(4) “OFFICIAL DOCUMENT” icon disappears when rubbed.(5) Double Ghost Watermark is printed on backs.(6) Blue Security Background.(7) Security Information border. If all security features are intact, the document has not been copied. We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc..“Fake Diploma Certificate” generally ships within 1-2 days. What our customers say about us. More Certificates NOTE: When filling in your personalization formyou may NOT use the name of any existing school! Certificate Number FC-24   RETURN POLICY   TERMS OF SERVICE   CONTACT US   ABOUT US FAKE DIPLOMAS Fake Certificates are $16.95 and Measure 8.5 x 11 Inches You’ll Receive Two (2) Identical Certificates May be used as a gag stag party gift or to roast a friend on their birthday, etc. Personalized Fake Diplomas Certificates are pressure embossed with a notary-type stamp in the upper left These are not legal documents and will not be accepted by any government agency as such.In fact, you’ll probably end up in “TerroristJail” if you try to pass one. We’re sorry we even have to add this caveat: NO! We will NOT fill your order for a diploma from the “School of Engineering” in Dubai or Iraq! Our certificates are for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. If it’s not obvious that you intend to use this product for humorous purposes, your order will be cancelled. George W. Bush Graduates from Ninja School NOTICE: Please do not inquire about one-of-a-kind certificates. We make no certificates that do not have a mass market Small print reads: Has Successfully Completed the Course of Study Prescribed by this Institution and is Therefore Entitled to this Diploma AS Testimony Whereof We Have Hereunder Affixed Our Signature(s) This ________ Day of ____________, _____, at ___________________________ Ninja School, School of Ass-Kissing, Pervert School, Makeout School, Astronaut School, Spelling School, Niceness School, School of Tact, Stoopid School, Sex School, Computer Skool, Liar’s School, Drinker’s School, Crazy Driver’s Education, How to Skip School School… You can think of millions more. Frame one and display it next to the professional diplomas in your office to see how long it takes before someone notices. People often ask us, “How real do these certificates look, anyhow?” There’s no way to answer that since everyone’s idea of “authentic” is different. In some cases we didn’t try to make them look authentic. People also often ask if fake diploma certificates are “legal”.Legal to own for fun? Yes. (but check your local laws to be sure)Legal to use for fraudulent purposes? No.Our fake certificates are offered for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY and are so stamped. We can’t control what you do with them when you receive them, and we’re not liable for your actions. If we sell you a pretty polished rock, and you go out and throw it through someone’s window, we’re not liable for that, either. NOTE: The embossed seal says, “Certified [SEAL] Document”. You’ll receive three certificates, all of which are printed on “High Security Paper”, which is a peculiar stock into which many anti-copy schemes are incorporated. For instance: (1) When held under a black light a series of tiny red threads become visible.(2) A large “VOID” appears in the background in four positions when the document has been photocopied.(3) Micro text is printed across the entire document which disappears when rubbed.(4) “OFFICIAL DOCUMENT” icon disappears when rubbed.(5) Double Ghost Watermark is printed on backs.(6) Blue Security Background.(7) Security Information border. If all security features are intact, the document has not been copied. We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc..“Fake Diploma Certificate” generally ships within 1-2 days. What our customers say about us. More Certificates NOTE: When filling in your personalization formyou may NOT use the name of any existing school! Certificate Number FC-24 BUY IT The image below depicts all customizable fields. They’re shown in Arial red in this example, but print in Old English dark blue (like the word “DIPLOMA”).The image above depicts all customizable fields. They’re shown in Arial red in this example, but print in Old English dark blue (like the word “DIPLOMA”).

Fake Certificates are $16.95 and Measure 8.5 x 11 Inches You’ll Receive Two (2) Identical Personalized Certificates Item Number — FC-01 Embossed Seal Embossed Certificate Providing Irrefutable Evidence of the “Largest Penis in the World” (a great [disgusting] birthday gag). Obviously we had to place gray bars over all the risqué parts. The truth is WE can’t stand looking at them. We’ve made this certificate just as disgusting, offensive and obnoxious as we possibly could. Black-out bars are removed for printing. Trust us—it’s gross. Personalized, of course. (Must be 53 or older to order). We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc.. The item number is FC-01. “World’s Largest Penis” generally ships within 1-2 days. What our customers say about us. NOTICE: By clicking the ORDER button below you agree and stipulate that such material is not illegal in the state, county or town of delivery, that you do not find such material offensive, and that you will refrain from allowing minors or anyone else who may find such material offensive to view this product. This product is for entertainment purposes only, to be used as a gag and/or a joke, and not for illegal purposes such as but not limited to harassment or defamation. You agree to hold TrixiePixGraphics harmless for any and all mischief you may cause with this product. If you do not agree to the above stipulations then you must not order this product.  Item Number — FC-01

Fake Certificates are $16.95 and Measure 8.5 x 11 Inches You’ll Receive Two (2) Identical Personalized Certificates Universal Fake Certificates Certificate Graphics May Vary Slightly NOTE: The embossed seal says, “CERTIFIED WORLD RECORD“. You’ll receive two certificates, printed on hi-gloss heavy photo stock We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc.. “Universal Fake Certificate” generally ships within 1-2 days. What our customers say about us. Certificate Number FC-23 $16.95 Printed with archivable inks for zero fade Remember, we will NOT fill orders for any certificate that is not humorous in nature: “Certified Explosives Engineer”? Not a chance. “Dental Technition”? No way. “International Breast Inspector”? OK! “Make-Out Judge”? Certainly. “Sex Therapist”? Probably. “Cosmetologist”? Nope.

For the Loud Mouth in your life… Teresa Kerry Big Mouth Award The Teresa Heinz Kerry BIG MOUTH AWARD Item Number — FC-49 Here’s how we see it: (1) John Kerry is where he is today as a direct result of the fortune of Teresa Heinz Kerry (aka “The Ketchup Princess”). (2) John Kerry has many of the problems he has today due to Teresa Heinz Kerry’s BIG FAT MOUTH. Got a friend, ex-friend, co-worker, neighbor or boss also afflicted with a BIG FAT MOUTH? Send ’em a Teresa Heinz Kerry BIG MOUTH AWARD. Who knows….maybe they’ll “get it”. Certificates are personalized with: RECIPIENT’S Name Gold seal is pressure-embossed (not printed) and reads: CERTIFIED WORLD RECORD. 8.5 x 11 inches. Printed on heavy glossy stock Sez 65-year-old first-lady wannabe with a giggle in an interview with CBS News(!) “I’m cheeky, I’m sexy, whatever. You know…..” Celebrating the subtle yet important distinction between “Opinionated” and “Obnoxious”. We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc.. FC-49, “Big Mouth Award” generally ships within 1-2 days. What our customers say about us. $16.95 for 2 Printed with archivable inks Item Number — FC-49

Now You Too Can Have John Kerry’s Purple Owie Award Got a paper cut? Painful hangnail? Hemorrhoids? Indigestion? A Pimple? You qualify for a Purple Owie Award Item Number — FC-47 Some people don’t know if they like John Kerry or not. He doesn’t seem to have a lot to say. Why? Because he’s too busy boasting about his Purple Heart. For a guy who couldn’t wait to cut the thing up in public after Vietnam, he sure likes to work it into conversation when he thinks it’ll pull in a few votes. Make up your mind, John! Either you’re proud of the thing or you’re not! We have questions about the severity of John’s “wounds” for which he received his Purple Heart(s). We sort of wish the United States Armed Forces wouldn’t hand the real ones out like candy. A Purple Heart should be a serious award. It means the recipient has put it all on the line for his country (you and us), and almost lost the game. We feel that when Purple Hearts are given out like aspirin, it detracts from the value of the award when given for real injuries, like lost limbs. You don’t have to go to war and get shot to get this Purple Heart. You can have it for a few bucks. -Or, heck, maybe John Kerry’ll give you his. Certificates are personalized with: Victim’s name Injury(s) suffered When and where “A Unique and welcome gift for anyone with an owie!” Gold seal is pressure-embossed (not printed). 8.5 x 11 inches. Printed on heavy glossy stock, this particular certificate is highly detailed. (that’s John Kerry from our “Morning After” collection on the medal) The perfect alternative to a cheesy “Get Well” card! Tape this on the wall in the patient’s room and watch the staff provide slightly better care. After all, what nurse can forget the patient who’s won the Purple Owie Award? Know someone who just broke an arm, leg, skull, their ego? For friends recovering from an illness, injury, operation… Forget cheesy “get-well” cards. Make ’em smile with a Purple Owie Award! We’re not sure how fond we are of George W. Bush these days, but My God! Give us something better than Frank Burns and Howdy Doody! Give us more than a cry-baby 2nd Louie and a smarmy Tele-vangelist! Give us something more than Ted Baxter and the Cheshire Cat! And the government wonders why no one votes. FOR WHOM?!? We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc.. FC-47, “Purple Owie Award” generally ships within 1-2 days. What our customers say about us. $16.95 for 2 Item Number — FC-47

Every couple of years some “service” comes along which offers to sell you an acre of the Moon, or to name a star after your girlfriend—whatever. These companies promise to record your “purchase” with some prestigious-sounding organization somewhere. We’ve seen the prices range from about $75 to over $500. We always wondered why folks fell for this, because there is not, and won’t be in your or our lifetimes, any agency which has exclusive or meaningful control over who names what after whom in outer space. Ten companies can charge to name the same star after ten different people—and none of it is “real”. So we thought, what the heck; all these people are really getting for their $75-$500 is a cheesy certificate which isn’t enforced or even recognized by any “real” agency anywhere. We decided to bypass the B.S. and offer a much nicer certificate, with a wider range of choices, for $16.95. This “Deed” isn’t recorded in any official office. And if you ever travel to Neptune you will NOT have the authority to kick some party-hardy slug-like Neptunian off “your” property. This is a gag gift, a novelty, a stocking-stuffer—every bit as “genuine” as the one your cousin back in New Jersey bought for $250. All the World’s Great Fortunes are Based on Real Estate Begin Amassing Your Own Fortune One Square Inch of Any Planet You Choose (except earth) Item Number — FC-38 Reverse-printed on “backlight film”, which is a kind of space-age-looking stuff. These certificates are gorgeous. The outer finish is more glossy than glass, and just about indestructible. May be framed, or may be backlit for a truly special effect. Lower left features a pressure-embossed gold seal. Extremely glossy, mirror-like finish Roll and tie with a scrap of ribbon (ribbon not included!) Backlight for a truly spectacular effect Certificates are personalized at the end of the payment process; specify “owner’s name”, name of planet, and date. We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc.. FC-38, “One Square Inch of Land” generally ships within 1-2 days. What our customers say about us. Certificates and Other Kinds of Things $16.95 (one certificate) Item Number — FC-38 

Every couple of years some “service” comes along which offers to sell you an acre of the Moon, or to name a star after your girlfriend—whatever. These companies promise to record your “purchase” with some prestigious-sounding organization somewhere. We’ve seen the prices range from about $75 to over $500. We always wondered why folks fell for this, because there is not, and won’t be in your or our lifetimes, any agency which has exclusive or meaningful control over who names what after whom in outer space. Ten companies can charge to name the same star after ten different people—and none of it is “real”. So we thought, what the heck; all these people are really getting for their $75-$500 is a cheesy certificate which isn’t enforced or even recognized by any “real” agency anywhere. We decided to bypass the B.S. and offer a much nicer certificate, with a wider range of choices, for $16.95. This “Deed” isn’t recorded in any official office. And if you ever travel to Neptune you will NOT have the authority to kick some party-hardy slug-like Neptunian off “your” property. This is a gag gift, a novelty, a stocking-stuffer—every bit as “genuine” as the one your cousin back in New Jersey bought for $250. All the World’s Great Fortunes are Based on Real Estate Begin Amassing Your Own Fortune One Square Inch of Any Planet You Choose (except earth) Item Number — FC-38 Reverse-printed on “backlight film”, which is a kind of space-age-looking stuff. These certificates are gorgeous. The outer finish is more glossy than glass, and just about indestructible. May be framed, or may be backlit for a truly special effect. Lower left features a pressure-embossed gold seal. Extremely glossy, mirror-like finish Roll and tie with a scrap of ribbon (ribbon not included!) Backlight for a truly spectacular effect Certificates are personalized at the end of the payment process; specify “owner’s name”, name of planet, and date. We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc.. FC-38, “One Square Inch of Land” generally ships within 1-2 days. What our customers say about us. Certificates and Other Kinds of Things $16.95 (one certificate) Item Number — FC-38 

Every couple of years some “service” comes along which offers to sell you an acre of the Moon, or to name a star after your girlfriend—whatever. These companies promise to record your “purchase” with some prestigious-sounding organization somewhere. We’ve seen the prices range from about $75 to over $500. We always wondered why folks fell for this, because there is not, and won’t be in your or our lifetimes, any agency which has exclusive or meaningful control over who names what after whom on the bottom of the ocean. Ten companies can charge to name the same star after ten different people—and none of it is “real”. So we thought, what the heck; all these people are really getting for their $75-$500 is a cheesy certificate which isn’t enforced or even recognized by any “real” agency anywhere. We decided to bypass the B.S. and offer a much nicer certificate, with a wider range of choices, for $16.95. This “Deed” isn’t recorded in any official office. And if you ever travel to the bottom of the Mariana Trench (unlikely) you will NOT have the authority to kick some party-hardy sea-slug off “your” property. This is a gag gift, a novelty, a stocking-stuffer—every bit as “genuine” as the one your cousin back in New Jersey bought for $250. All the World’s Great Fortunesare Based on Real Estate Begin Amassing Your Own Fortune One Square Inch of the Ocean Floor(with rights to heavy-metal deposits) Item Number — FC-39 Reverse-printed on “backlight film”. The outer finish is more glossy than glass, and just about indestructible. May be framed, or may be backlit for a truly special effect. Lower left features a pressure-embossed gold seal. Extremely glossy, mirror-like finish Backlight for a truly spectacular effect We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc..FC-39, “One Square Inch of Land” generally ships within 1-2 days.  $16.95 (one certificate) Item Number — FC-39

Every couple of years some “service” comes along which offers to sell you an acre of the Moon, or to name a star after your girlfriend—whatever. These companies promise to record your “purchase” with some prestigious-sounding organization somewhere. We’ve seen the prices range from about $75 to over $500. We always wondered why folks fell for this, because there is not, and won’t be in your or our lifetimes, any agency which has exclusive or meaningful control over who names what after whom on the bottom of the ocean. Ten companies can charge to name the same star after ten different people—and none of it is “real”. So we thought, what the heck; all these people are really getting for their $75-$500 is a cheesy certificate which isn’t enforced or even recognized by any “real” agency anywhere. We decided to bypass the B.S. and offer a much nicer certificate, with a wider range of choices, for $16.95. This “Deed” isn’t recorded in any official office. And if you ever travel to the bottom of the Mariana Trench (unlikely) you will NOT have the authority to kick some party-hardy sea-slug off “your” property. This is a gag gift, a novelty, a stocking-stuffer—every bit as “genuine” as the one your cousin back in New Jersey bought for $250. All the World’s Great Fortunesare Based on Real Estate Begin Amassing Your Own Fortune One Square Inch of the Ocean Floor(with rights to heavy-metal deposits) Item Number — FC-39 Reverse-printed on “backlight film”. The outer finish is more glossy than glass, and just about indestructible. May be framed, or may be backlit for a truly special effect. Lower left features a pressure-embossed gold seal. Extremely glossy, mirror-like finish Backlight for a truly spectacular effect We accept MasterCard and VISA, etc..FC-39, “One Square Inch of Land” generally ships within 1-2 days.  $16.95 (one certificate) Item Number — FC-39